I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i think i have herpe
just one?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
