a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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