Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
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If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
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All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!