Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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