Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
