i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
