I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
