I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
