the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
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