So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
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