just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
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i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
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I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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