just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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