Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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