I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
