is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
