Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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