She's JV to your varsity
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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