I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
third nipple confirmed
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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