Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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