So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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