just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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