thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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