@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
