My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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