porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
