is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
