There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
FUCK WHALES
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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