I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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