So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
