their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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