fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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