This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
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