Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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