LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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