No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
