conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
no you cant smoke seaweed
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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