if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
