its not stalking. its research.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
