you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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