did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize