I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize