Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
