Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
