I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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