very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I still have a little drunk in my system
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
