is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I'm too high and old for this...
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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