oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i just had sex bonerless
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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