I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I deserve this hangover.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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