Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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