i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
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